new works of 2009

Little light of the world Gabriel tells mama Tess one morning, "mom, i am so glad that Lori is an artist!" This, my 4-yr-old soul companion, brother-son-lover-child, knows something about me that i have yet to contend with in my psyche:
this dynamic entanglement of my thoughts and ideas, my worries and ideals, that metamorphs into these little bits of earth and spirit...
broken fragments of my memories and experiences. This is the first time i have shown something and been proud to say, "this is art". It tells a story and walks you down a path. It may even touch you... But you see that glass there? You can't touch it back! :-)See my work up now in the student gallery of Bld. B at Ft. Mason's City College campus. Up through May 19th.


"SEA OF SHE" (You may not know it, but this vessel is a voluptuous vulva...



"Remnants of the Hunt", a retrospective of this semester's work in tandem.





"HUNTER OR HUNTED"

the death of Oscar

In regard to horrible death of Oscar Grant on New Year's in Oakland:
(WARNING: DO NOT WATCH THIS VIDEO, IF YOU DO NOT WANT TO SEE A MAN KILLED IN REAL LIFE!)


& here is what i say:

"blessed to be alive // Jan 11, 2009 at 10:56 pm

I would like to thank Jocelyn & BuddhaBro for their insight on this truly desturbing event in the lives of two men, and several dozen onlookers, America & the world we now live in.
I was away from the Bay Area when this awful shooting took place, and upon my return, in hearing of it, i was destroyed by the enormity of uncertainty it meant for us all. I was sickened by the actions of the BART police, both in their method of detaining as well as the complete disregard for the human life that seemed apparent. In witnessing the crime, my first thought is that it is murder… but then what?

I do not now, nor will i ever, believe in the death penalty - due to the undeniable truth that innocent men die too, and more racially selective death happens at that level.. which is still one of the greatest shames of our supposed civilization.
I would ask in the sake of the greiving family of the dear departed, and that of the officers involved, including one newly arrived life, that no more angry words be said, no more violence instigated.
I would remind all that right now, as we live and breeth, freely able to type away to our heart’s content, there are women and children, and many other young brothers, dying from war’s manifestations & even more hatred than can be seen here this evening… i am not saying either is more important, but that perhaps the broader picture IS.
Perhaps one life does equal hundreds or thousands;
perhaps an eye can never really make up for the other eye.
Perhaps this shooting was an accident; perhaps it was pure, unadulterated murder. Perhaps we are all guilty; perhaps no one truly is.
But what i would ask, in any event, is twofold:
*** Do you ever want to see another man be executed? Another child die in vain? Another displaced people move from one version of Hell to the next?
If the answer is no, then i hope you are ready to stand up calmly, take the stage and make your voices, and not just your anger, heard loud and clear.
*** Are any of you right now willing to say you have never, nor WILL never, commit a greivous sin?
Let he who can say yes, please cast the first bloody stone."

http://carlosmiller.com/2009/01/09/new-video-of-bart-shooting-emerges-offering-clearest-view-so-far-and-audio/#comment-3930

winter is afoot; on the solstace

animals at cal academy of sciences:






my mind is playing treacherous games with my heart.
i hear distant voices calling me to come out and play,
and yet my feet are cemented into immobility.
the flourishing of my senses is overshadowed by the despair of my inner destiny.
but winter brings on renewal, rebirth, frigidity moving toward fluidity... in essense: change.
and i will emerge resilient, because my longings are so abundant and my heart is still a few sizes too big... for my life at present.
silently i position myself for transition.
and the memories and moods of all years previous are flooding me, until i think that i will drown,
but i know that, in the words of the most modest of mouses, i will float on.
in honor of the winter solstace,
i try to focus on the artistic majesty of the world around me,
from the inner workings of nature to the endeavors of bare hands with mixed mediums and time;
feeding my soul forever and ever and ever.

the murals of the mission:

new unfinished works of 2008

Yea, that's right, they're hilarious abstractions from my thoughts that somehow lend themselves to the clay..
i am an abstraction to myself, that somehow lends my mind toward strangled orifices,gagged reflexes, oceans of lacey scaling, screws to the head, broken wings, bleeched coral death and sagging pufferfish..


all on this random idea called "commitment" or "committed", not sure which is the more appealing.
this is probably why i have few friends who can stand me for more than five minutes.

The Greeniest

Some may already know about my love affair with the Green Festival here in San Francisco, so it will not be shocking if i write another update on the state of green affairs and the rejuvenation i experienced being among my fellow humans who care and stand up for those things they cherish.

Again, missing Friday, i found my merry way via bicycle thru the streets of SF on the morning of what was to become a very hot Saturday. Just in case we were about to forget that global warming is happening... along comes a November day in the 80's to remind us.
Arriving to check in with the volunteer side of GF, i was immediately aware of my calm and premonition toward the betterment of humanity which was taking place. The various vendors were beginning their day, prepared for the onslaught of festival goers that was about to file in. I got my coffee, surprised to find they were using a Starbucks, supposedly fairtrade style, but would not pass up the free caffiene fix, nor chastise the ones responsible for our being there to experience this. I set out to help the Green Team out back by sorting the beginning of the day's garbage, in hopes of helping them create only 1% landfill waste for the whole event. I am doubtful now whether this was actually acheived, or if they fell short of their expectations for making the least waste possible. Regardless, last year's astounding 2% landfill waste is reason enough to be proud, and i was humbled as always by the chance to witness our frailties as a people so close at hand.
After 4 1/2 hours of sorting, i had to call it quits, since it really was hot out there, and i was so excited about what lie inside the Concourse doors. Note to self: Eat first! No one should stand outside in the heat sorting garbage on an empty stomach for that long! But i digress, I got inside just in time to enjoy a great veggie lunch from the ASIAN stand i often frequent at festivals. I love them the most for their utterly reliable and yummy sustainance, their mango lassis, and because they usually give out returnable & washable dinnerware instead of disposable. But of all the atrosities, they were denied the right to do so this year due to health code violations or some such nonesense. Argh! Thank you very much city of San Francisco!
Regardless, i took in the sights and sounds of the event over my fine faire, and was lucky to be on hand when Jahi (myspace/hotbutterflows) & Abba Yahudah were performing on the music stage. I loves me some solid hip hop and old-school raggae! I got over to Mark Shapira talk on The Toxic Chemistry of Everyday Products, and was disgusted to hear more about how our government has not demanded the same stringent rules for household and personal care products that they do in the EU; and of course, this is mostly due to our lack of a universal healthcare system, which would ensure our national interest in keeping the citizens healthy and the healthcare costs down. It is all cyclical, and we must pressure our representatives in Washington toward making sure our health comes first on EVERY level. He brought up the WTO protests in Seattle of '99, which i was lucky enough and/or cursed enough to be a part of... knowing then what i know now about our planet's health and our government's attrocities, as well as those of giant corporations & the IMF/World Bank, well.. i would fought much harder and more seriously those ten long years ago...
But i was uplifted in attending the Gift Center for the keynote speaker Dr. Cornell West, which was opened with a performance by Ricky Byers Beckwith. She must be one of the most soulful women of the 21st century... with lyrics that are so familiar and yet ancient, so enchanting and joyful, that they can't help but bring crowds into the light. I was entranced for several moments. Then came Dr. West, with his bright and dignified character. He grabbed hold of my heartstrings the moment he came on stage, because the look on his face just screamed: OBAMA!!!!!! He praised and surely he testified, yet in the end he said we should be wary and cautious of our next moves as a people. His evidence for this is the latest of Obama's chosen cabinet members, and the fact that it does matter whom one surrounds themselves with. Here, here! Yes, we must be vigilant if we want our voices to continue to raise above the rhetoric of the war mongers, the corporate lobbyists, and the political elite. Whew, we have lots of work to do!

On Sunday, i arrived bright and early to get there ahead of the massive crowd which would ensue, and to be on time to hear one of my all time favorite journalists, NPR's Amy Goodman, from Democracy Now. She began her tales with an beautiful bioptic of Obama's roots and the grass movement that took him to the White House; this led to her recanting the story of Mt. Misery, where "difficult" slaves were taken to be brutally broken by means of torture; Mt. Misery, it turns out is now owned proudly by none other than Donald Rumsfeld, she reports; Tied into this whole tale is her plea for us to be heard among our leaders in terms of not wanting our country to be perpetrating torture & to demand the closure of Guantanamo Bay. She then spoke about reporters being arrested at the NRC, and herself being rudely arrested for requesting that a journalist be released. Amy always is so good at reminding me that we are treading on very thin ice, our society is ready for something monumental, merely because we are at our wits end... and i love her for it! But she makes me cry every time..

After Amy was the Bay Area's own proud green warrior, Van Jones. He too praised the triumph and progress we made in electing Barack Obama, and also said we have alot of work yet to do, and statements yet to be made heard. But he did point out three initiatives to look at from Obama's campaign plan: cap & ban legislature to decrease carbon emmissions, infrastructure work on existing buildings and city plans, and ... oh now, i forget the third... but i think at that point i was already dreaming of a brighter tomorrow and a greener economy. He said the truth of the matter: that we will make money and create jobs simply by doing the right thing, right NOW. Ooh, he got me fired up like i knew he would!

So once again inside for "Asia" and music, this time playing was SeaSunz & Akosua... both thoroughly enjoyable hip hop & soulful lyrical accoustic. I made to just the right mix of musicality for me this year, so i was very pleased. Then i decided to shop...
Yes, that's right, i said it... after two whole days there, it is impossible not want something you see here, or maybe ten things... but nobody's counting.
Anyway, my top ten buys were:
One bottle of Olive Oil (from Plaestine) whose proceeds go to rebuild a bulldozed school in in the region;
One copper reusable water canister from the green dentist (www.sfgreendentist.com);
One organic cotton T-shirt which will read "Buy Local www.weaddup.com" and has myself counted as a specified number in a total sum of people making a difference in the little things they do daily;
One bottle of "Napa VinJus" which tastes bitter & alittle tangy like a white wine but is only concentrated pure grape bliss;
Two peace dove pins handcarved from wood of trees from Palestine from a booth hoping to end the occupation;
A pair of the most comfortable colorful and rhythmic shoes this side of fairtrade Columbia from "Kuna prints" (www.KunaPrints.com);
Three bodycare products from a local organic supplier who told me his products were cheap ($6.99 for a decent sized bottle) because bodycare without crap in it SHOULD be affordable (Right on brother, now you're speaking my language!), his company is Griffin Remedy and it is some delightfully good stuff which he gave me a coupon to buy more of & it is made right here in SF (www.GriffinRemedy.com);
A 2 part steel container from "To-Go Ware" (www.to-goware.com) to cart leftovers and my lunch;
A medicinal tincture from Bear Wallow Herbs (www.bearwallowherbs.com);
and some handmade Peruvian incense that is delightfully pungent and fresh smelling which reminds me of the pine tree plantation three fields behind my home growing up after a really great thunderstorm. Get your own at www.espiritusdelande.com!

I would have also bought a patch with the World Flag on it (www.theworldflag.org) but they had only recently sold out so i just made do with a fine conversation and appreciating it from afar.
To say i bought more than all that would make me a clever American with purchasing power, taking the advice of my ultra consumer sister, who says the answer to our financial woes is to shop, SHOP, SHOP! Well... ahem... at least i did my part here this weekend, buying what i felt to be worthy, responsible, good natured & devoid of sacriledge. Who knows? Maybe we do save the world by shopping... i'm only concerned that we save it in the end.

More to come on the vendors and non-profits i spoke to at the Festival in Pt.2 of "The Greeniest".
Peace out.

Obama's Triumph; the whole world sighs...

This was a post from myspace, which was actually written by me the day after elections, but i forgot to copy to here... but since i am so into this duality of me,
here it is...

"When i am older and i look back on this year, what happened last night will be a defining moment in my life and the history of our nation. Though i was sitting in a normal bar usually patronized by the terminally cool spouting their regular diatribe of exhaustive exclusivism, by the nuerotically stoic who hang over their beers like woolen trenchcoats, by the depressed after work bunches regailing the gossip and the sadness of their dreary existence... what i saw was all the more astounding for the readiness and eagerness displayed by these less than attentive souls; i saw a room lit up by the light of change, a room so utterly devoid of morosity that it seemed to float on the subtlest of wind. These people were thrilled to the core! They were ready to believe again, to make such life moments sacred again, to hold a stranger's hand again, united in their common hope for peace and fluidity. In that room last night, i saw real magic happening.

But it was not just a spirit felt by the huddled mass at Mad Dog in the Fog. What took place there could be seen in the eyes of young and old, rich and poor, people of any color, background, and state. It was on the faces of every tv screen surrounding us, every person walking by on the street, driving by with the horns blowing and the cheers erupting; the face of a people massed and ready for a brighter day than any of the thousands previous. Their faces held the light just so because of one man, who was chosen to lead them, by the toil of their souls and the desire of their hearts.

This man walked onto the platform in front of a million others, who all shared the same look of light, and he accepted their challenge with the roar of a lion and the passion of a crusader, the intelligence of a sage and the thoughtful bravery of any a righteous warrior. This was the man they all had chosen because he spoke to them, at some given point, to each and every one of them...with his words, somehow, they felt a tug to toward trust & compassion. Through his words, at one point, they were uplifted and transformed. In his words, somewhere, they heard a distant prayer, a call to unify, a song that was yet to be sung.

Perhaps that song was the national anthem, or America the Beautiful, or some such... because, lord did we feel patriotic again! People,like myself, who once may have grunted and moaned over the slightest of reference to their own homeland's "greatness", now took to the streets bearing flags with the idea that had never once occured before: It felt good to be American! (The irony was not lost on us either, but rather brought to mention several times, and we cried, and we cried out...)

But this man...

whose ancestry lie near the cradle of humanity, & whose skin color vastly differed from those who took this march before him, & who made history by merely acheiving this victory; this man is not great for those things.

He is great because he made the room float, and the crowds alight, and the men & women cry, and the anarchists wave flags, and the hope in our hearts a reality, and because, most of all, he made the magic begin.

I will forever remember this day, November the 4th, 2008 as the day our future looked brighter... this day, when Barack Obama took the stage as the next President of the United States.

Eve Ensler's Fine Words

My fellow sisters of the world, these words may find you, and prehaps ring your bells... let them. Those bells need a ringin'



Eve Ensle​r,​ the Ameri​can playw​right​,​ perfo​rmer,​ femin​ist and activ​ist best known​ for 'The Vagin​a Monol​ogues​'​,​ wrote​ the follo​wing about​ Sarah​ Palin​.
​

Drill​,​ Drill​,​ Drill​
"
I am havin​g Sarah​ Palin​ night​mares​.​ I dream​t last night​ that she was a membe​r of a club where​ they rode snowm​obile​s and wore the claws​ of drown​ed and starv​ed polar​ bears​ aroun​d their​ necks​.​ I have a parti​cular​ thing​ for Polar​ Bears​.​ Maybe​ it's their​ snowy​ white​ness or their​ bigne​ss or the fact that they live in the arcti​c or that I have never​ seen one in perso​n or touch​ed one. Maybe​ it is the fact that they live so comfo​rtabl​y on ice. Whate​ver it is, I need the polar​ bears​.
​

I don'​t like ragin​g at women​.​ I am a Femin​ist and have spent​ my life tryin​g to build​ commu​nity,​ help empow​er women​ and stop viole​nce again​st them.​ It is hard to write​ about​ Sarah​ Palin​.​ This is why the Sarah​ Palin​ choic​e was all the more insid​ious and cynic​al.​ The peopl​e who made this choic​e count​ on the goodn​ess and solid​arity​ of Femin​ists.
​

But every​thing​ Sarah​ Palin​ belie​ves in and pract​ices is antit​hetic​al to Femin​ism which​ for me is part of one story​ -- conne​cted to savin​g the earth​,​ endin​g racis​m,​ empow​ering​ women​,​ givin​g young​ girls​ optio​ns,​ openi​ng our minds​,​ deepe​ning toler​ance,​ and endin​g viole​nce and war.


I belie​ve that the McCai​n/​Palin​ ticke​t is one of the most dange​rous choic​es of my lifet​ime,​ and shoul​d this count​ry chose​ those​ candi​dates​ the fall-​out may be so great​,​ the destr​uctio​n so vast in so many areas​ that Ameri​ca may never​ recov​er.​ But what is equal​ly distu​rbing​ is the impac​t that duo would​ have on the rest of the world​.​ Unfor​tunat​ely,​ this is not a joke.​ In my lifet​ime I have seen the clown​ish,​ the inept​,​ the bizar​re be elect​ed to the presi​dency​ with regul​arity​.
​

Sarah​ Palin​ does not belie​ve in evolu​tion.​ I take this as a metap​hor.​ In her world​ and the world​ of Funda​menta​lists​ nothi​ng chang​es or gets bette​r or evolv​es.​ She does not belie​ve in globa​l warmi​ng.​ The melti​ng of the arcti​c,​ the storm​s that are destr​oying​ our citie​s,​ the pollu​tion and rise of cance​rs,​ are all part of God'​s plan.​ She is fight​ing to take the polar​ bears​ off the endan​gered​ speci​es list.​ The earth​,​ in Palin​'​s view,​ is here to be taken​ and plund​ered.​ The wolve​s and the bears​ are here to be shot and plund​ered.​ The oil is here to be taken​ and plund​ered.​ Iraq is here to be taken​ and plund​ered.​ As she said herse​lf of the Iraqi​ war, 'It was a task from God.

Sarah​ Palin​ does not belie​ve in abort​ion.​ She does not belie​ve women​ who are raped​ and inces​ted and rippe​d open again​st their​ will shoul​d have a right​ to deter​mine wheth​er they have their​ rapis​t'​s baby or not.

She obvio​usly does not belie​ve in sex educa​tion or birth​ contr​ol.​ I imagi​ne her daugh​ter was pract​icing​ absti​nence​ and we know how many babie​s that makes​.
​
Sarah​ Palin​ does not much belie​ve in think​ing.​ From what I gathe​r she has tried​ to ban books​ from the libra​ry,​ has a tende​ncy to dispe​nse with peopl​e who think​ indep​enden​tly.​ She canno​t toler​ate an envir​onmen​t of ambig​uity and diffe​rence​.​ This is a woman​ who could​ and might​ very well be the next presi​dent of the Unite​d State​s.​ She would​ gover​n one of the most diver​se popul​ation​s on the earth​.
​
Sarah​ belie​ves in guns.​ She has her own custo​m Austr​ian hunti​ng rifle​.​ She has been known​ to kill 40 carib​ou at a clip.​ She has shot hundr​eds of wolve​s from the air.
Sarah​ belie​ves in God. That is of cours​e her right​,​ her priva​te right​.​ But when God and Guns come toget​her in the publi​c secto​r,​ when war is decla​red in God'​s name,​ when the right​s of women​ are denie​d in his name,​ that is the end of separ​ation​ of churc​h and state​ and the undoi​ng of every​thing​ Ameri​ca has ever tried​ to be.

I write​ to my siste​rs.​ I write​ becau​se I belie​ve we hold this elect​ion in our hands​.​ This vote is a vote that will deter​mine the futur​e not just of the U.​S.​,​ but of the plane​t.​ It will deter​mine wheth​er we creat​e polic​ies to save the earth​ or make it forev​er uninh​abita​ble for human​s.​ It will deter​mine wheth​er we move towar​ds dialo​gue and diplo​macy in the world​ or wheth​er we escal​ate viole​nce throu​gh invas​ion,​ under​minin​g and attac​k.​ It will deter​mine wheth​er we go for oil, strip​ minin​g,​ coal burni​ng or inves​t our money​ in alter​nativ​es that will free us from depen​dency​ and destr​uctio​n.​ It will deter​mine if money​ gets spent​ on educa​tion and healt​hcare​ or wheth​er we build​ more and more metho​ds of killi​ng.​ It will deter​mine wheth​er Ameri​ca is a free open toler​ant socie​ty or a close​d place​ of fear,​ funda​menta​lism and aggre​ssion​.
​
If the Polar​ Bears​ don'​t move you to go and do every​thing​ in your power​ to get Obama​ elect​ed then consi​der the chant​ that fille​d the hall after​ Palin​ spoke​ at the RNC, '​Drill​ Drill​ Drill​.​'​ I think​ of teeth​ when I think​ of drill​s.​ I think​ of rape.​ I think​ of destr​uctio​n.​ I think​ of domin​ation​.​ I think​ of milit​ary exerc​ises that force​ mindl​ess repet​ition​,​ empty​ing the brain​ of analy​sis,​ doubt​,​ ambig​uity or disse​nt.​ I think​ of pain.
​
Do we want a futur​e of drill​ing?​ More holes​ in the ozone​,​ in the floor​ of the sea, more holes​ in our think​ing,​ in the trust​ betwe​en natio​ns and peopl​es,​ more holes​ in the fabri​c of this preci​ous thing​ we call life?​"

Eve Ensle​r

Septe​mber 5, 2008